Lindsey Saunders Music

The Dreaded Date

2011-08-12T17:14:00.000-07:00

We've all experienced it, and we all dread it: That awkward date that just keeps being awkward and doesn't stop being awkward no matter what you do. It usually involves fidgeting with the napkins or playing a quick game of chess with the salt and pepper shakers... For some of you, it may even involve making a sneaky escape out the bathroom window. You know who you are ;). Anyway, This song I wrote called Middle Name involves the horrific dating experiences of young adulthood. But if what they say is true about how "high school never ends", then this one goes out to all the single ladies (and gent's too!)

So what made me write this song? It's that one experience that I'm pretty sure 90% of women experience at least once in their lifetime. It happens during that time when you suddenly discover that you're not as gangly and as awkward as you used to be, and you start noticing that you can't get away with wearing certain clothes anymore without your mom stopping you in the driveway yelling "Aren't you gonna wear something over that top?! It's too revealing!". It's the same year that guys start to notice you.

I was blessed and cursed with a guy who pined over me. It was all very flattering until the day I realized that just because a boy gives you a lot of attention and says nice things about you doesn't mean that he has your best interest in mind. Don't get me wrong, this entry is not intended to bash on the guys! I'll be the first to admit girls can be just as bad, only in different, trickier ways (which in my opinion, can be much worse). But, there have been a few guys that I involved myself with long enough to realize that they weren't really attracted to me, but rather what I could do for them. Their words said that they "loved" me more than anyone else, but their actions showed that they saw me as an ego boost.

I'm fortunate enough to have influences in my life that exposed the truth about situations such as these. My dad is the biggest one next to God. I remember when I was younger my dad used to take my sister and I out on "dates". He would ask "Where would you like to go? You name it, we'll go there!" Usually I would ask if we could go to McDonald's (yea, that was before I knew the caloric intake of french fries!) and then to the book store where he would buy me various books that usually had something to do with horses. He basically treated my sister and I like princesses. At the end of the date he would say "Now that's how a young man should treat you!"

I am sad to say that the number of fathers who are willing to do this for their daughters are dwindling. Because of my dad, I can say that I've been able to avoid a lot of heart ache, but this song is for the girls who have not had that convenience. I hope from the bottom of my heart, that someday this song will be able to help them.

Girls, if you have never had someone in your life who treated you like a princess and taught you so many lessons you need, and you've gone through so much pain because of it, I need to tell you this: There's a reason why people call God their "Abba Father!" And what a beautiful reason it is! It's because God loves you unconditionally, like how a father should love his daughter. If you want to, you can ask him to be your father right now and I promise He can change your entire perspective!

As for the young men out there who do treat girls the way they should, please keep up the good work! I know we don't show it, but us girls really appreciate it. Plus God sees it all and He will bless you for it!

Confession #1

2011-07-26T22:50:00.000-07:00

Confession: The song I'm about to talk to you is not about what you think it is *plays "phsyco" theme song*. Perhaps you should listen to it before I tell you the deep secrets behind it ;) It's called "Officially"

OK. I will be the first to admit it. I am not, by any means, a rebel child. I am not "B.A." and I will certainly never be known as the girl who "plays it cool". I'm not a smooth talker - I'm not smooth about anything, although this song tends to mislead people into thinking so! I suppose it can be interpreted a lot of different ways, but when it comes to the songwriter, (yours truely!) it can be easily misunderstood.

When I was still a little girl, I made a decision about myself. It is not a choice that most people ever think to make at all let alone in elementary school, but I did. It all rooted from one, silly little thing: grades. ... What? Yes, my grades! Let me explain. From grades 1 to 8, I went to a private Christian school. It was a safe community, so my parents decided to place both me and my older sister there (I do believe it was a good decision on their part, despite everything). If you've never experianced that kind of environment - let me explain it to you!

We've all seen them. Those freakishly talented kids. You know, the kids who's parents always brag about them. I can't help but think of it like a little competition between parents: "Well joey learned to speak French fluently... And it only took him one week! We're so proud!" "Oh is that so? Our little Jane learned all there is about calculous in a matter of seconds!" and all that rediculous talk... OK, maybe I'm exaggerating a little! But you get the picture. The Christian private school scene is interresting to say the least. It is cool to be a nerd! I promise you, if you get streight A's - you're golden! You won't have much of a problem fitting in, that is, unless you aren't also good at sports! Unfortunate little me was never all that good at either one. I have not-so-fond memories of my pants falling down in PE and getting C's on all my Math tests... Not to menchine the Latin tests - Let's not go there!

Anyway, I felt somewhat misunderstood from a young age. I felt like people didn't really give me much of a chance and what I wanted more than anything in the world was for someone to dig deeper into me, to understand who I really am. I wanted people to see me as more than the girl who really botched her spelling test and really needs to put a brush through her hair (no, I wasn't exactly in touch with proper hygene at the time I am sad to say!). Unfortunatly, it took a long time for people like this to come into my life. But I decided right then and there that if no one was going to be that for me, then I was going to be that for everyone else. Hah, well I've learned that it's kind of a tall order.

Over the years I've worked hard to be the person this song is talking about. I wanted to be that person who makes an impression on someones soul. I wanted to give people joy in the deepest parts of who they are, which is not found in grades or sports or music or anything like that. I wanted to love people, and I still do. I don't say this to toot my own horn by any means, in fact, I sometimes think that this promise I've made to myself is unreasonable. "Offically" is written as a kind of "thank you" to... well, me, from I don't know who. But hopefully someone, someday.

The challenge in the promise is figuring out where I should invest my time and my heart. What is good and what is just a waste of time and energy? I know that I can't be everyone's hero, and it's not really my job to be. I'm starting to come to terms with this. But I still hold hope that someday I will be able to be someones hero, in some small way.

"Make me a channel of your peace, Lord
Where there's despair in life, let me bring
hope
Where there is darkness, only light
And where there's sadness, ever joy."

A Song for My Sister

2011-07-18T14:10:00.000-07:00

Set aside the fact that I look like a retard in the thumbnail - the video I'm putting in this post is in fact one of the "top rated" songs among my family and friends. It's a song I wrote for my sister, Jamie, as a graduation present! I know, I know, it's kind of a cheap gift. But I really do think this was the best way to see her off as she departed from our home in Colorado and went off on a wild adventure to Penn State for a degree in architecture!

It's probably pretty easy to see that I've always been really close to my sister. Well, for the most part! I remember little spats we got into when we were really young about "Who stole my Barbie?! MOM!!" etc. But once we got over that, we were pretty much best friends!

Like most siblings, Jamie and I had what I like to call "the Spy Phase" where all we could ever think about was how we were going to stealthily snoop around the other girl's room and find out her secret crush or anything else that could be even the slightest bit embarrassing. At one point I even convinced my parents to let me buy a "spy kit", which it turns out was a waste of money because the red laser pointer did not, in fact, do anything even remotely useful in the complicated plot of finding out who my sisters crush was. But I will always remember one thing in particular about the Spy Phase, which I sing about in "Jamie's Song". The first thing that you need to know about me before I explain this story is that I always have been, and always will be, a terrible liar. I also cry really easily, and I can't stand conflict - yes, I was that insanely creative, sensitive, rainbows-and-bunnies-and-sunshine little girl! So you can probably imagine my reaction one night when my sister found out that I had been reading her diary earlier that day. I was a mess. I cried, begged for forgiveness and grovelled at her feet. I can imagine the little Me repeating phrases like "I understand if you hate me for the rest of your life!" or "Go ahead, Jamie! Tell mom and dad!!! Tell them to ground me for the next 20 years!" and of course the all-too-familiar: "I'm a horrible person!!!" Her reaction, much to my surprise, was to forgive me. I think I must have been too adorable to hate in that moment. She told me that she wasn't going to tell mom and dad and that - since mom still wasn't home from the store - we should go ahead and start the movie (Stuart Little) without her. I might have learned more about life from my sister that day than some people learn in a lifetime: what it is to forgive another person.

"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."

-Ephesians 4:32

The second major memory I share, and still laugh about with my sister is something we refer to as "that one moving day!" and then *laugh hysterically*. My family was moving out of a little apartment we had stayed in for a short period of time while we were waiting for our present home to be built. We were trying to walk down the flight of stairs that lead to the front door carrying heavy boxes of books and other random junk. Well, anyone who knows me knows that I am not particularly athletic. Nore and I "buff" or agile. Actually I'm quite the opposite! So being 95 lbs at the time, carrying a box that is basically as big as I am - full of stuff, and carrying it down the stairs... Yea, not a good combination for someone like me! So long story short I fell down those stairs, the box opening and spilling various bits of Jamie's middle school memorabilia in what seemed like slow motion, Me - flailing about, my limbs doing very unnatural things... Gooood times... Despite the fact that I was kind of shaken up, we must have laughed about it for 15 minutes straight. I've taught myself over the years the ability to laugh at myself - it comes with the territory of being a klutz! When we finally surveyed the wreckage, we discovered that I had broken a glass jar full of little shells - a present from her former best friend in middle school. It shattered and all the shells were all over the floor. I remember feeling so bad for ruining such a precious memory, and of course, like always, I started crying. But my sister is one of those people who knows what is really important and what isn't. She didn't care at all! All she did was laugh and tell me that it was just a little glass, and that we should probably sweep it up before mom or dad steps on it.

Have you ever had one of those friendships that is so natural that, even if you haven't seen each other for years, you can just pick up where you left off? That's what it's like with me and Jamie. The only way I know how to describe it is the way I describe it in Jamie's song: The more things change, they stay the same. I know that's true now that I've spent an entire school year with her away from home and it hasn't affected our relationship at all - I thank God for that all the time! (I also thank Him for Facebook and Skype and the telephone)

^ Perfect description of our relationship....

It's Enchanting to Meet You!

2011-07-16T10:33:00.000-07:00

         So this is my first blog! And if you're anything like me, you're probably reading this thinking "Oh no. Not another teenage girl who is about to bombard my computer screen with pointless posts about her love life - or lack there of. Yeeaaah..." - and *click* off you go to check your Facebook, or twitter, or whatever you're signing into these days! I admit, I have wondered what I could possibly say that would be worth while. Although my friends affectionately tease my about how my life is "so much like a soap opera!" I will - for your sake - spare you the details!

I have decided to go about this whole blog thing from a different angle.

        In case you didn't already waste 10 seconds of your life reading the "About Me" section of my profile, I am a 17 year old Singer/Songwriter. Songwriting is my outlet, it gives me a voice and I thank God for my ability to do it! I don't know about you, but when I listen to my favorite songs I always wonder what was going on in the artists life, what made them write this song. I think most people like the know the background of a song and what it's true "meaning" is. Of course, part of composing a good song is leaving it open for translation but there is always that curiosity... At least that's how it is for me!
         Anyway- getting back to my point! The idea of my future posts will be centered around my original music. I'll go into more detail about what the song is really about, what happened to make me write it, who was it written for (if it was in fact written for anyone), and so on so forth!
If you haven't heard my music, I hope you'll check out my YouTube account. If you've heard my music, I hope you like it! If you like my music, well - I hope you read my blog! Thank you for your time, and from the words of the Great Taylor Swift: It was enchanting to meet you!

http://www.youtube.com/user/volcomstone1694